I saw something at the grocery store today that I’m still shocked about. A mother was shopping with her two kids. The little boy was probably no older than three. He was sitting in the front of the basket, face-to-face with his mom. I overheard the mom ask him if he wanted some applesauce and he screamed, “Shut up!” right in her face.
I’m not even going to pretend I didn’t stop what I was doing to see how she was going to react. I know I would have been shocked had that been one of my kids, but she wasn’t. She just smiled my way, shrugged her shoulders and said, “boys will be boys.”
I’ve long hated that phrase. Even before I had any of my boys, I’ve thought that was the most ridiculous excuse ever. I watched a video recently that really summed up why this excuse is so horrible. Kristina Kuzmic has quite a large following on YouTube for her parenting videos.
“In my opinion, boys will be boys is the biggest insult to men because boys will be boys implies that they can’t help it. They can’t help what they say, or what they think or how they act. They’re just born that way. It also implies that they have no self control and that they have no power over their own actions…see, I want my sons someday to be respected, and news flash, people, they’re not going to be respected unless they are respectful…I want my sons to grow up knowing they can be respectful and thoughtful…I’m not just raising my kids.
“I’m raising someone’s future spouse, possibly someone’s mom or dad, someone’s employee, or maybe even someone’s boss…hopefully someone’s closest, most loyal friend. That’s why this parenting gig is the most important responsibility of my life.”
Letting children skate by in life on the excuse that “kids will be kids” or “boys will be boys” is doing them no favors. It’s up to all of us to make sure the children in our lives grow up to be productive members of society.
Reach Kathleen Guill at 580-379-0588, ext. 2602.